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02 June 2009 @ 09:15 am
 Real time strategic Gears of War type battling with your pokemon in the trenches of the great TEAM ROCKET WARS! Battle for survival over Wifi or with a girl, if you happen to know one, and ultimately free the LEGENDARY POKEMON from the evil grasps of TEAM MAGMA, ROCKET, and AQUA. Communicate using hand signals and flash cards with NINTENDO's adaptive real time response visual attachment. Game is expected to ship to retailers Mar 2010 WORLDWIDE!

Image not from game.
15 July 2008 @ 12:45 pm

Big Announcments:

*-larger sexier stylus on the way for Nintendo DS. Reggie said 'it will be like a baby's arm holding an apple'".

*-Microsoft has partnered with Sasha Baron Cohen for an exclusive Xbox Live game..

*-Sony's partnership with American Express Platinum for Platinum Card PS3 owners, triple points on micro-transactions. No blackout dates for mileage redemption on travel in United States, must have latest firmware and use latest browser to fully benefit.


Jack Tretton's call on developers to eliminate load times "in my lifetime." Interspersed with footage of crying children watching load screens, Tretton's emotional presentation left many people speechless.

FFVII - Restless Child Broken Dreams - exclusively for all consoles it explores the mythology of Aerith and uses all new "static summon, tactical recall active or real time combat"!

Zune games on your 360. Now you can play them at home. and on the go "scores updated wirelessly"!

The Let Downs:

No new Mario Party games for the next three months...

Live Titanium Service... fifteen managable payments of 39.99 over two years guarantees you lifetime LIVE service or until the new console comes out.
25 December 2006 @ 02:46 pm
Could you believe it?  They let me out of the slammer for selling those bootleg copies of King of Fighters '94: Rebout just in time to wish all the BlendSpottingers a very merry (and hopefully white) X-Mas!!  To celebrate the season, I've compiled my five favorite BlendSpotting articles for yours and everyone's holiday enjoyment.  Behold!

CONRAD to jump into the video game t-shirt market!

Xbox360 Mascot Revealed

Sony's new PlayStation Portable Micro to have "S-pad" !!


Rapid Fire #3 (Friday, August 5th, 2005)

Think of it as some sort of BlendSpotting clip-show.  Don't hate me!
09 October 2006 @ 11:54 pm
28 September 2006 @ 12:01 am

Yes, folks, BlendSpotting is still alive and well! Fresh off the lawsuit, I'm proud to reveal (for the first time anywhere) Capcom's bringing their critic-impressing Okami out for Nintendo's next-generational powerhouse! Details are sketchy as to when and why, but an inside source has confirmed that one new character, three Devil-slaying new stroke techniques, and four new bosses will be in the game. Capcom also confirmed the Wii's controller will be utilized in some fashion but wasn't too clear how. This is a sure sign that things are in the earliy stages. Most Wii games are designed based on the controller's movements. However, to reverse-engineer a game to the high gaming standards Nintendo's Wii is sure to represent, Clover Studio seems to have a lot of work ahead of them if they are to make the November 19th launch date.
01 April 2006 @ 12:31 am
Electronic Arts will be releasing a new game in their "Madden" series some time this year for the Playstation 2, Playstation 3, Xbox, Xbox 360, and an as of yet unnamed platform.

Project Manager Allan Greensworth had this to say about the new game in the Madden lineup:
Our new Madden game is going to be the best in the series to date, as it will include updated rosters, the ability to micromanage the entire league right down to details such as parking, concessions pricing, and fans. We have even included a fan editor in the game! You can also play as any NFL team to ever have existed, going all the way back to the league's creation in 1920. Additionally, we've secured licenses for the AFL (American Football League), the AAFC, NFL Europe, the SSFL, the MCFL, the Arena Football League, as well as teams from the other "football" (known over here in the US as "Soccer"), so you can see how the teams stack up. We've been busy getting motion capture from players, living and dead, in order to recreate the accuracy of these teams.

Of course, with every game, there's always some sort of a developmental snag; Greensworth told us this outright:
However, adding in all of this customization has come as a price - we have had to downgrade the quality of the graphics in order to fit all of this information in the game.

What follows is a screenshot of the newest Madden game:

Greensworth remains adamant that this leap backwards in graphics technology will not hinder the latest Madden game, however:
I'm sure that all our fans around the world will recognize the sacrifices we have had to make in order to create the greatest football game ever made, past, present, or future.

Upon release of this news, EA stock (ERTS on NASDAQ) shot up 1% to $55.23.
(Photos leaked from the website, subject to change)

No longer having to depend on Cafepress or Hot Topic for new and played-out trends of video game-based articles of clothing, this new clothing line is designed "For today's gamer. Someone too important to actually talk and voice his or her or his opinions. I think this will be so popular I'll have to spend all the money I make before the bank tell's me they're full of all my money!" said CONRAD.

CONRAD is the premire guru in the fast-paced world of tacky Game Boy Micro faceplate designs. His experience of well over 10 months has earned him numerous awards and three ulcers. While invested heavily in this new enterprise, he will continue his work with the Micro faceplates at the request of Nintendo. No BlendSpotting model/secret agents were killed in this BlendSpotting update. Yes, "this one" .... MWA HAHAHAHAHAHAH!
21 January 2006 @ 08:17 pm

World-famous visionary Uwe Boll gives up movie-making and returns to his first passion in life: exotic animal veterinarian. It was his dream since childhood but was unable to pass the final residency tests and was expelled on unrelated charges. "It was a crushing defeat," says Boll in a 1998 interview, "but I was quick to find hope and direction in life as a director. Get it? Hahahaha! Director! Hahahaha!"

Boll was believed to be in Siberia, finishing the last of the on-location shooting for the upcoming Postal film, but dissappeared four days ago and was believed dead. Losing people from a Boll production is a first. The actors are chained to their trailers between shots and the filming crew would wear thoses cool neck-exploding-thingies from that Total Recall movie, the Director (Boll) was never restrained to the shoot in any way. A mistake that has now jeopardized the Postal film target release date of February 14th.

Boll made his most recent appearance at the Berlin International airport, making a formal statement about his business and goals... But it was all in German for some reason. Our German-speaking German BlendSpotting correspondant, Holger Tesselheifer, was unavailable so we have no idea what he actually said. Boll was said to be enrolling in the Winter classes at the Munich University of Animal Sciences and use his good looks and international fame to take another shot at becoming the man whose hands will soon be wrist-deep in the beautiful and beloved endangered species of the world.

We here at BlendSpotting wish him really good luck.

BlendSpotting's authentic and reliable inside source over at the Nintendo.com forums (a true fan and master of all things Nintendo) has come through for us here at BlendSpotting. We'll give you a few minutes to go and call your friends over to "check this out".

At first, you may notice the familiar and sleek clamshell is gone, and a see-through, more "warpy" design has emerged. The two screens are roughly the same size, and the unit seems to be more streamlined to them. No more "boring box handheld" for Nintendo! While speculations originally ran high over a more Revolution-like design, or something like an iPod, the opposite seems to be true. Straight out of 1999 comes the awesomely puntuated aesthetics that made the Nintedo 64 so eye-worthy (almost like a hot swimsuit model). The molded plastic curves and a low-set button layout almost look like those old Tiger handhelds, rememeber?

The three new buttons to the systems read "WEB", "MAIL", and "PRIME". We at BlendSpotting can't wait to see how these new buttons will affect and EFFECT gameplay in the future. Our hats are off to you, Nintendo. A detailed report is being written as we speak, but we knew you faithful BlendSpotting readers couldn't wait like the rest of the stupid would! We bet you feel as special as us right now, right!?

(ps: Hey, Nintendo, send us free units okay?)
23 December 2005 @ 10:46 pm

With great anticipation for what's sure to be the next craze, the makers of Bawls Energy Drinks comes this new and totally different energy drink for a new, untapped market. BlendSpotting was luck enough to sit down and read an email possibly typed by Corporate Moneymaker and P.R. Fiend, Jeff Rosely.

"Thank you, but an interview will not be possible at this time. I will talk a little about what our new product, Lawls, is and maybe a little about it's design.

For the hardcore internet users out there, daily life consists of surfing along the highways chock-full of information and memes and porn memes. They post in forums and whine about drycleaning and paying rent and maybe even family problems. We realized long ago that people get thirsty while complaining and harassing others and like to drink things while they are online. Unfortunely, they are afraid of spilling drinks on their equiptment and are forced to get up and drink something elsewhere. BUT! What if "something" could be drunk NEAR a computer with no problems or worries??

We were 100% up to the challenge and created (and patented!) a special cardiohydroxilate enzyme-compound beveragoid that WILL NOT damage or impare a computer board, key board, or even mother board in the unfortunate "spill". Having safely tested Lawls on l33t and non-l33t, or "unleet", electronics, we feel the market has waited long enough for such a quiality drink.

At first, the flavor was really hard to nail down. Something... sugary enough to hide the septimonic polyphoshate aftertaste early batches had. Then we decided that adding fruit juices, while healthy and low on carbs, was preobably out of the question until that damned monkey in the warehouse has been captured. Initial taste-testing was done in Canada, by well over 400 internet-addicted felons in the fine Forstone County Correctional Institution. The side-effects were studied and slowly hammered out of the system. Long-term results are currently classified, but in a good way!


A few weeks ago, we nailed down the name and purchased the website. The first ads will go up in PCInternetter, The Gamer's Quarterly, Hardcore Forums Digest Monthly, Yahoo Internet Life and CatFancy starting with the February issues. The actual retail product will be shipped to the 45 continental states that have no "laws" preventing our fine product to be sold and/or ingested. We are expecting good things, and feel our valued customers have no real option in the matter.

Thank you."

Consider us warned! The price will be about $2.45 a bottle, but each one will have 4 free iTunes downloads writen in front 3 on the cap. The flavors will be "Blue", "Sky Water", "Aqua", and "BeefJurky".